What a night.

Around 2am, the battery in the floor level plug-in CO2 monitor in the hallway by the bedroom failed. The device (plug-in, mind you) started to beep – approximately once every 90 seconds. This woke me. I got up and stared at the CO2 monitor, as well as the two ceiling mounted smoke detectors in the hallway, declared myself mentally incompetent to deal with the situation right then, and shut the door. This woke , who heard a beep and asked me to fix the problem at the source.

So I grumbled, picked the wrong beeping thing, got a stepstool, and started to take down the smoke detector that’s hardwired into our security system. This set off the house alarm. Sirens. Klaxons. Annunciators. Loud. Okay, okay, now I’m awake. What? Huh? Help? Sirens? Help?

Replaced the detector in its sconce, went back into the bedroom, and keyed in the “all clear.” Sirens stopped. Woah. Ow. Then the phone rings. Security firm checking in. “Were you aware of the fire alarm on the second floor?” Yeah. Yeah, I’m aware. Ow.

Back into the hallway, unplug the correct beeping thing, remove the battery, and fling it in the closet. That’ll teach it. Then, back under the covers.

Perhaps 5 minutes later, my pulse is back down below 100bps, and we hear what sounds like an electrical short – also coming from the hallway. I’m like “what, huh?” I get up, and localize it. There’s a fly buzzing madly on the floor, going in tiny circles. I’m assuming that the sirens drove it insane. Pick up the fly, out the window. Close the window. Back to bed.

redmed is like “what was that?” I’m like “deranged insect.” She’s like “huh?” I’m like “shh-sh-sh.”

I think that at some later point the clothes drier un-balanced itself and started beeping madly – but that could have just been a bad dream.

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