I have decided that the news lately makes more sense if I assume that some shadowy, world-spanning conspiracy has begun their terraforming initiative in preparation for a takeover by the evil from beyond time and space.

Seriously. “National treasuries are plundered AND volcanos erupt AND we accidentally fill the gulf with oil?” Too confusing.

Much simpler to say “National treasuries were plundered TO make the volcanos erupt AND to fill the gulf with oil.”

Don’t get me started on that little firecracker bomb guy in Times Square. When they fake that hard, you back off and look for the real attack coming over the hill behind you.

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