So, I\u2019m getting my hair done<\/s> cut, and there\u2019s an ongoing conversation about family, the holidays, and so on. My stylist shared a few real gems:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
1) A decent definition of \u201csufficiently drunk\u201d is when you think that cows are really, really funny \u2013 but are still sober enough to think that running out into a cow field to try to push them over is a very bad idea.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
2) \u201cThere\u2019s something to that whole boy, girl thing,\u201d because \u201cwomen tend to be too cold, and men tend to generate insane amounts of heat. Two men in a bed is just too much!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And finally, number 3) We were talking about travel with family, and how with some family members it\u2019s comfortable to just sit and read \u2013 or to be in each other\u2019s presence. At which point he exclaims \u201cyeah, I\u2019m like that with my mom. I totally should have married my mom.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The salon murmured with gentle approbation, so he continued: \u201cy\u2019all \u2013 I\u2019m from New Hampshire. We\u2019re allowed to marry 1st cousins there.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Someone allowed as to how that might, or might not, be over the line. He finished: \u201cDamn, you\u2019re all just jealous because you don\u2019t have any hot cousins.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
On a lighter note, my<\/strong> cousin was telling stories over Thanksgiving. He shared the story of how his handgun safety instructor had actually shot a mugger. Apparently the instructor was up against a wall and had already handed the guy his watch and wallet. Then the story changed to \u201cnow I\u2019m -a- shoot you.\u201d He turned around, drew his pistol, and shot the guy 17 times. When the police asked why he shot the man 17 times he answered: \u201cI ran out of bullets.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Seems perfectly reasonable to me.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" So, I\u2019m getting my hair done cut, and there\u2019s an ongoing conversation about family, the holidays, and so on. My stylist shared a few real gems: 1) A decent definition of \u201csufficiently drunk\u201d is when you think that cows are really, really funny \u2013 but…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[61],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1868","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-just-bloggin"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/dwan.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1868","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/dwan.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/dwan.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dwan.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dwan.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1868"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/dwan.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1868\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1869,"href":"https:\/\/dwan.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1868\/revisions\/1869"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/dwan.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1868"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dwan.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1868"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dwan.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1868"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}